Transcript “Evolution of The Divine Masculine”, Healthy Life Radio, Tuesday August 16 2022
Alisha:
Hello and welcome to the Alisha Das Show “Live Your Love”. So delighted to be with you today. I have the most amazing guest. You’re in for such a revelatory and fun time. So I have with me, Stephen McGhee. Stephen, say hello.
Stephen:
I’m so grateful to be here, Alisha and I love your language already, revelatory.
Alisha:
Thank you. I’m promising, and it’s not a word I use lightly, that Stephen will reveal some really fascinating and pragmatic tips for really embodying and nurturing the Divine Masculine and this applies equally to men and women. So you are in for a delight. Let me tell you a little bit about Stephen. Stephen is the owner of Stephen McGhee Leadership Incorporated, and he’s been in the field of leadership development since 1994. So he was a pioneer. He’s spoken internationally, leads board retreats, panel discussions, and has authored three amazing books on leadership; one being “Get Real, Vital Breakthrough on Your Life and Leadership”. He’s an executive leadership coach to influencers across the globe. Stephen creates designs programs that really create learning velocity. He has also led the Stephen, how do I say this a cut?
Stephen:
Are you are not the first to ask. It’s a mountain called Aconcagua.
Alisha:
Aconcagua Man Project. He made this into an incredible documentary with a GoPro, which I promise will leave you on the edge of your seat and is so inspiring. It’s called “Climb to Freedom”. I’ll give you the link for that later. So here’s the best thing about Stephen’s bio, Stephen does not believe in modern day gurus that espouse truth. Rather, he believes in deep and meaningful dialogue that opens others to possibility, mindset, actions and inspiration. I just love that, that is beautiful. So we figured out that I have known Stephen for almost 30 years now, which is amazing. We have been involved in the same spiritual organization all that time. And I have to tell you, my experience of Stephen is that he really walks his talk. He’s a very masculine brother of mine, which is why I asked him to do this project with me, but he’s also deeply sensitive and to me, you really embody the best of the Divine Masculine, and you really can teach us how to actualize the divine part of that. You are a dear soul, friend of mine, so
kind.
Stephen:
What a beautiful intro. You know, it’s a day to day thing for me and really a progression. This is not like somewhere that any of us get to, as an event. It’s just a process. We’re all in, all the time and I would say, especially me. So, in my language, I work my process daily, to do my best to bring out the best in my Divine Masculine expression and my Divine Feminine expression. And thank you for having me, Alisha, I’m super stoked. We’ve had fun just talking about what we’re going to talk about. But we’re also both really clear that this wasn’t something we were going to do a big prep for, and have a curriculum from A to Z. So it’s going to be fun to see what Spirit and God brings forward for us
Alisha:
Completely. And you know on purpose we did that, we didn’t prepare for this so that we really could be channels of divine intent and that you, our beloved listeners, would really inform what is brought to the table in this incredibly timely and such an important topic for both men and women. And women, I want you to stick around. Obviously, this is clearly relevant for men, but women this is equally relevant for you. So I want to tell you, Stephen does this brilliant (it is going to be an absolutely transformative) exercise but it’s deeper than that – expression of forgiveness – yes from men to you and then I’m going to do one from women to you men, so stick around to the end for that. It’s going to be phenomenal. I’m going to be surprised if we’re not both in tears. So with that, I introduced the topic which is the Divine Masculine and it’s really about how do we cultivate and actualize the best of the Divine Masculine within ourselves as men and women, and how do we nurture that in our mate, and we are going to get into that with our revelatory topics. But first, we’re going to call on the light, I’m going to invoke the highest within us. So by whatever name, you know, God, the divine, higher power, please call yourself forward into that. And beloved spirit we just now open ourselves to receive to be channels of your divine intent, we ask that this show each one present each one listening be infused with a light of the Holy Spirit, that this light ripple through each of us, not the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine would wrap around us, the Father and Mother God would dwell within us as us, nurturing and inspiring us. We place this talk, this time together, each one present into the light for the highest good, opening in every way to spiritual presence to spiritual attributes to spiritual assist.
Stephen:
And just to have each of us listening, take a moment to really invoke what Alisha has just said, such that there would be a surrender, and an allowing to whatever part of the show resonates with you, your soul, and your highest good. That’s how Alisha and I like to roll with the highest good of all concerned. And so we invite that light of living love, once again, right now through grace into your heart and your mind as we navigate this show and this journey of life.
Alisha:
So be it to the highest good, so be it bless it be. Thank you, Stephen. So this is a Stephen McGhee, quote, “The Divine Masculine is not run by ego, the Divine Masculine is run by God.” So to me, that really turns things around. And to me it really takes us from that which can be considered toxic masculine, the alpha male of course, the you know, the patriarchy, all the things that we are, are shifting and transforming from into the divine. So see me, would you walk us through what you mean by the Divine Masculine? What is that?
Stephen:
I’ll be happy to do my best but before I do, I want to just admit that in a very real way, I don’t know what I’m talking about as a truth. It’s just my best experience my best way of expressing what this Divine Masculine is. I can tell you that as a young man growing up without a father, for the most part, I could almost say for all of the part, like really gone, and when he was there, he wasn’t really there, if that makes any sense.
I remember as a young man struggling with what does it mean to be a man? And there was a true blessing in that, Alisha, because what I got to do is surrender to that. I remember praying. I remember hearing my parents fight when I was five, late in the night, in the dark and I remember feeling scared. But I also remember the prayer that started “Our Father, who art …” and it evolved into my own conversation with God. And as part of that, I was curious, what would it mean to be a man now I’m a little boy. So I don’t know exactly what I’m asking for but I kind of don’t want to be like my dad. So I know that part. That was the beginning of it and I got some answers. But I also had a society, a culture globally and in North America reflect back to me, this toxic alpha male, that maybe comes in some part, in my opinion, a religious construct of kind of control or run by super ambitious effort, that denied maybe a higher good. So where we’re going today is in a way a dismissal of that old patriarchal, alpha male, not as an againstness but just as a cry for a solution to a greater cause, a higher good for the healing of the Divine man and the Divine woman on this planet. Not just for a relationship, although that’s always nice, right? Whether it’s your spouse or a friend, like we are like brother and sister, you know, there’s power in a potency in the synergy, when there is that polarity. So that’s the contextual direction, I think Alisha of where we’re going to journey today.
Alisha:
That is just beautiful Stephen and I love that story because, you know, to me it’s taking challenging circumstance and looking for what is the spiritual opportunity there? Perhaps I want to be different than my parent but how do I rise up beyond what was presented to me and connect into that divine part. I can supersede what I was taught. To me you demonstrate that beautifully. That is a great segue to my next question which is really about, you know, there’s been so much talk about gender fluidity, of course, and I think it’s a beautiful healing to come into such greater acceptance of that. I think there can be a misunderstanding with it, where it’s thought we’re all the same. We should all be the same men and women should be the same. And the reality is, we’re not the same. We are clearly different, you know, our bodies are different and there’s many studies about the different ways our brains work and process information. As a woman it can be tempting to think of men as you know, hairy women, and that they are saying something that I would say for the reason I would say it and they’re not. They’re innocent. They’re actually saying it for a completely different reason because their brain works differently. As I understand that, and embrace that, then there’s such a greater peace within me. When we look at this, we’re not talking about dissing gender fluidity at all. Again, that’s really beautiful. It’s more cooperating and embracing what is, you know, and bringing forward that beautiful balance within us. For me, you are a very masculine man who also has a deep sensitivity. I would like to hear Stephen, not only how do you strike that balance, but how can we as, as women, really have the best of both of being deeply feminine, and being take charge leaders? How can men be incredible actualized leaders and be deeply sensitive? How do you strike that balance?
Stephen:
I’ll get to that, but first when I’d like to reflect back to you what I heard, which was you said cooperation, but I would start with acceptance, because I love that you pointed out that there’s a physical difference between men and women. And that accepting that there is a difference might be access to greater synergy, and the polarity that is God given. Having said that, and I think you said this, but to make it really clear, there’s no part of me talking to men or talking to women today. I don’t see this as either or. I see it as both. As I look at my own life it was the acceptance that I have both those parts inside of me, and to release remove any guilt or shame that I have about my Divine Masculine or Feminine. Now for me the journey and to get more to the answering the question, it was really in doing deep forgiveness around what it means to be a man coming from my heart, and coming from my soul. Because there’s so much on the planet today that goes against men and against women. Maybe rightly so. Right? Like, there’s no part of me saying none of that should be here because we’ll talk later about totality and there’s cooperation with the totality of who we are as spiritual beings having this human experience. But for me, it was to relieve the shame and guilt about the attributes of my maleness, and when it was reflected to me in a way from a woman or a man that had me look at myself. I wasn’t always quick to do it, because it’s very confusing. Like, was this my part? Or was this just their projected part on me as a man? Does that make sense?
Now we’re getting into some of the spiritual psychology now but there’s where I had to be so deeply authentic and honest with myself, and once I could do that it put me into a whole new experience of that polarity and the balance and had me claim. I’m 60 now so, you know, I’ve been at this a while. I’ve been doing deep work for 30 years, and I’m still in the iteration of it. So I hope all the listeners are gentle with themselves as they do this journey. I don’t know what you heard in there in terms of the answer to your question, but it’s in part acceptance, and it’s in part cooperation but a large part is the forgiveness of any shaming, or guilting, that I might have had about any of those aspects inside of me,
Alisha:
That is just a gorgeous answer. The forgiveness of any shaming or guilt. At the end we’re going to do a guided experience so our listeners can really experience what you’re talking about. So, to me, that’s a massive key, forgiveness of any guilt. Just right now, in this moment, if everybody, if you would just please “I forgive myself for judging, any shaming, or guilt inside of me in relation to men, to women, to the masculine, or feminine within myself, and I accept and embrace it all.”
Stephen:
I haven’t met a perfect human being yet and I’m grateful for that. There’s something about embracing the imperfection, deeply loving it. Nobody said it would be perfect. My ego wants it to be perfect. The alpha male in me wants to be in control, wants to conquer, right. Maybe there was a place for that at some point along the way. I don’t understand it personally but I’ve learned that I don’t know. I want to slide in the idea that all of us could just say we tend to run in absolutes. Right? Wrong. And getting it right and getting it perfect.
Alisha:
I think you bring up an absolutely vital point that life can work a lot better if we really embrace our imperfections. Women do that too. We have the ideal woman and we beat ourselves up for not being this mythic ideal woman. We’re supposed to be gorgeous. We’re supposed to have 2.5 kids. We’re supposed to be running a large company. We’re supposed to have no wrinkles, and be loving all the time.
Stephen:
And men are supposed to have a Learjet, $1,000,000,000, 3% percent body fat, and all the other things that we’re supposed to have. Isn’t it crazy? It is crazy. Who are these mythic people? All I know is that we end up projecting on each other. Yeah and we need each other. I will say that again, we need each other. Yes, in my view, the planet, certain parts of the planet are in trouble, right? And until we can come together in the polarity of man and woman, divine male and divine female, until we can do that finding solutions at a global level looks pretty tough. When we come together in the polarity, in the synergy, there’s a potency in that and think of it like a battery. Batteries don’t work if you have positive positive. They only work if you have positive, negative, and that’s what we’re really talking about. We’re saying it’s okay that we’re both different and that we need positive and negative for the charge.
Alisha:
Gorgeous. So well said. Let’s look at some of the attributes of the Divine Masculine and how both women and men can call themselves forward into the finest of the masculine within ourselves and also really nurture that and call forward the finest the best the most Divine Masculine attributes in each other.
Stephen:
Okay. Be before I dive into the first attribute, I feel like it’s important to just mention that I think a lot of the work out there on the planet for men is amazing and I think some of the work on the planet for men is still supporting this toxic male. And so you will, as a listener, you may hear this a little differently than what you might be used to, if you’ve been listening to some of the work for men on the planet. To me, the first attribute is that of listening. I invite all the listeners to breathe in the attribute of listening. I don’t necessarily mean for content of another. If I can’t listen to my inner guide, my authentic self, I feel I don’t have much of a shot personally, at cultivating the Divine Masculine. When I look outside myself, for the approval of others, I’m out of my listening of self. When I’m comparing myself to that of others, I have moved away from my unique entelechy of the soul where I want to express because in my opinion that’s my curriculum, that’s my journey to evolve my soul.
I believe an important and maybe the first and most important attribute is listening. Listening to self will support my listening of others, to support the relationship in my life, the relationship in relation to all the relationships in my life. And next to that, in listening, is to understand that we can create through our listening. The old leadership model was tell. “Yeah, I’m going to tell you what to do, my whole team, what to do. All the people in the world what to do.” Immediately I created resistance as a leader on the team, or with my partner, because I know better than you for your own Soul. How egotistical is that? I’ve done a lot of that in my life. I found this listening itself to be so miraculous, for the experience of my own life, and it’s just a practice.
Alisha:
That’s so beautiful. I think a great word that can help us into that is curiosity. Like to just step back and be curious. When we think we know take a step back and be curious and open to the Divine unknowing. I love that you brought that up, Stephen, because a lot of women’s big complaint is men don’t listen, he doesn’t listen to me. I’m going to tell you a secret, right? Don’t tell anybody, but women like to talk. This is revelatory. Admission was exciting. I’m sorry, women, I don’t mean to betray us but there was a study saying that women actually speak two thirds more than men in a day (they measured this) and men spoke a third of the amount of words as women in a day. So clearly, that’s how our brains process. We need to be heard. I think it can be hard for men to listen. So just just a little bit more on listening for men specifically.
Stephen:
In my opinion, we can’t listen to others if we can’t hear ourself. If we go to another level for those of us that are interested out there, again, for men and for women too. Like listen to the Spirit of God and see what’s there. Now, if that’s not your language, it’s okay. You know, use your language. I have a best friend that would say the spirit of nature. But there’s listening in nature. I spend a lot of time in nature and nature teaches me a lot. If I’m looking for reflection from anywhere outside of me, it would be nature or spirit, but the Spirit dwells within right. So it’s really about cultivating that and then we’ll move on in a moment, but learning to listen and get clear on what am I hearing? I’m pretty well known for things in my life where I get asked to do something, sometimes I don’t answer, sometimes I don’t respond, or sometimes I’ll respond and say I’m not clear yet because I haven’t listened yet for what’s the highest good. I don’t always do that but anyone that knows me will tell you yes. It can even be frustrating for some people but that’s the groundedness of the Divine Masculine. Like I’m not going to move because someone wants me to do something. God is going to run my life and that’s where I’m going to be listening, getting clear, and eventually taking an action.
Alisha:
I love that. Gorgeous. So talk to us about groundedness and is that an attribute of the Divine Masculine?
Stephen:
It indeed is. So all listeners again, men or women, imagine a cord from your sacrum to the core of the Earth, and wrap it around the center of the earth, like a golden cord and then imagine another from your crown chakra, the top of your head, to the heavens and maybe that one never ends. Maybe that’s infinity. Maybe that’s the cosmos at the highest level. And notice how you feel in your body. I find myself to be grounded. There’s lots of times in my life and the work I do or in my life with the moving pieces and look at the planet, folks, watch the news, what do you want, you want to be grounded if you’re watching the news at all, because if you’re not, you’re probably like a leaf blowing in the wind. And that’s not what I want in my life. It’s not what I want as a leader or as an experience. So groundedness is key. I don’t know how that resonates with you, Alisha, in your experience of men or being with men grounded or being with women that were grounded?
Alisha:
Oh, no, it’s absolutely absolutely necessary. To me there’s a beautiful phrase for a tree to grow taller, it must sink its roots deeper. There is a man in my life who was very much not grounded, and to me wasn’t really manifesting the masculine as much and then he had a change of consciousness where he actually went much higher in his consciousness, and that actually helped him to be much more grounded. To me he’s so much more present in his masculinity even though he’s gone much higher in consciousness, he’s actually sunk his roots deeper. In my opinion and experience, a man/a woman has to be deeply grounded to soar.
Stephen:
Yes but we are going to get kicked around as human beings, as men, I’m going to speak for men, specifically right now. We are going to get kicked around. Anytime we go for it there will be people saying “You can’t do this. You’re not good enough. This isn’t for you.” That requires groundedness and clarity, and once we have that, I’m going to quote my great teacher, John Roger, “Spirit meets us at the point of action.” Now breathe that in listeners. It doesn’t meet us after. So mood follows action and a lot of us are waiting. I invite waiting for listening and clarity and groundedness and then what? Take a step and go do your thing, regardless of what other people think you should do. That’s been grounded in the Divine Male.
Alisha:
Gorgeous. Beautiful, beautiful summary. So listeners we have a really transformative exercise up next. First, I just want to tell you a little bit about Stephen. Stephen has some amazing classes, events support, you just go to McGhee Leadership, mcgheeleadership.com. You can also reach out to Stephen and find out about his upcoming courses and his phenomenal private consulting. Stephen and I are doing a live stream on August 20 at 10am Pacific Time, that’s a Saturday which is going to be on the Divine Masculine and we will be doing exercises and interacting with you. The archives will be on my website alishadas.com and my YouTube channel. Now, Stephen, tell us about totality.
Stephen:
Well I heard a question, “How would you define God?” I sat and thought and then the answer came as “totality.” I still wasn’t clear, like what does it really mean, but as I sat with it, as I listened to my guidance and got clear, in my groundedness it became really clear that it’s about all things, that God is dark and light, that God is fear and love, that God is negative and positive, and that when I love the totality of my existence, and the people in my world, I have a lot better chance of leading. I have a lot better chance of being effective, or impactful in a positive way, if I’m not afraid of the shadows. So again, I’ll use John Rogers name, but I remember him saying something like, “I’ve got one foot in the dark, I’ve got one foot in the light, and I keep my eyes on the Lord or the light.” And so I just share it with us, as an attribute to the Divine because we’re talking about not just masculine, but we’re talking about Divine Masculine, and the Divine Masculine includes acceptance and cooperation of the totality of who I am and who you are as a woman.
Alisha:
Beautiful. Just so well said. Now, I think this is going to be the ultimate moment of the show, Stephen set us up?
Stephen:
I spoke to this a little bit earlier. I think until we can do deep forgiveness at a collective level, we don’t have much of a shot at solutions to the larger problems on the planet. So I want to set us up for an exercise here to do that. Now to be clear, you can do this at home, you can do this inside yourself, and you can participate as Alisha and I demonstrate this.
I am going to speak to Alisha as the Divine Feminine. This is not me speaking to Alisha personally, because it wouldn’t make sense what I’m going to be saying for you personally, but it will make sense to you at the Divine Feminine level. I’m basically going to apologize for the transgressions of the Divine male, to the Divine female. I don’t know, I’ll go for 60 seconds. If you do this at home, you could probably go for many minutes on this, but I want to just give us a taste of it. Then I’ll invite you, Alisha to do the same from the Divine Feminine to me as the Divine male, but not to me, Stephen, to me as the larger Divine male,
Alisha:
Beautiful. So I’m just asking listeners, as you hear this, please receive this from Stephen, receive his apology to you women and as men receive it, as his apology to men as well. When I go, please receive it from me but receive it quite personally to yourself.
Stephen:
I just invite anybody doing this at home or, as you’re listening, to just place your hand on your heart. We ask for the light to guide this exercise. I
“I’m so sorry from the Divine male, to you as a Divine female, for the times I’ve lied to you, for the times I have been angry at you. And so sorry for the times that I’ve cheated on you, that I’ve objectified you sexually. And so sorry for the times that I have betrayed myself for you to please you. I am sorry and ask you to forgive myself for judging myself for the times that I have not honored you, the beloved Divine female in you. Just taken a moment to see what the larger shame and judgement is right now present with the Divine male. I got it. And so sorry for being afraid of your power by betraying myself and being afraid of the power of the Divine Feminine for trying to control the wild nature of who you are, and put you in your place. By making you feel less than by making you feel little, by turning my head and paying my brother’s more, even though you could do a better job. I’m so sorry for those times now on the planet, and all through space and time. I ask for forgiveness of self and forgiveness of the Divine Masculine to the Divine Feminine.”
Alisha:
So I just ask women out there to really receive that apology, that beautiful apology from the Divine Masculine to the Divine Feminine that our planet may heal. Thank you so much, Stephen. That was just gorgeous and healing for me personally, and I know for the women listening. So this will be me embodying my sisters, and apologizing from the feminine to the masculine. I’ll be speaking to Stephen but it is not personal to him, it’s personal to all men.
“I apologize, beloved men, Divine Masculine, for my treachery, for my manipulation for the emotionally blackmailing you. I apologize for using loud emotion and tantrums to get what I want, or to try to get what I want. I apologize for nagging you. I apologize for over speaking and over explaining and justifying my actions to try to convince you to my point of view. I apologize for seducing you. I apologize for using my sexuality to get things from you. I apologize for using my body, my beauty, my allure, to manipulate you. I apologize for being really angry and resentful of the inequality and being a victim, playing a victim, taking no accountability for that I apologize for being jealous of other women and being competitive and making that your fault. I apologize for my insecurity. I apologize for any times I have tempted you men, like Eve, like Lilith. I apologize for any of the ways that I have been a conduit of negativity, and seduced you to anything less than God. I apologize for cheating on you, for lying to you, for leaving you, for breaking your heart. I apologize for leading you astray from my own ignorance, for not stepping up inside into my own authentic power and blaming it on you. I apologize for using you as my excuse to be afraid of my own power. That was not your fault. I apologize for not stepping up into the actualization of the God that I am and making it your fault. I apologize for not rising up to meet you in the Godhead, which is where we walk hand in hand. When had been to wing, soaring, and spirit together, please accept my heartfelt apology. And forgive me as I forgive myself.”
Stephen:
I receive that on behalf of all my brothers and the Divine Masculine. I’m aware, Alisha, as we sit here, that this is probably round one of 100 rounds, but it is a beginning. And with our listeners that are interested and willing to participate, there’s a real strong potential for great healing. So thank you for this demonstration today. You know I’m aware of so much more I want to say to the Divine Feminine.
Alisha:
So beautiful and we will have that opportunity for a much longer livestream on August 20. So I hope our listeners will join with that. In the few moments we have left, I will would like to lead people on a little bit of an experience of what has been brought forward from Spirit today.
I ask our listeners again, as Stephen suggested before, to place their hands on their heart, just place your hand on your heart and just receive your breath. Receive a breath. Receive the loving of the Divine Masculine on that breath of Father God. And as you exhale, that love just amplifies as the Mother God wraps around you.
Beloved listener call yourself forward into that Divine Masculine, into the groundedness, the power, the courage, the clarity. And just to be aware of a grounding cord sinking from your root chakra, your tailbone, into the center of the earth. At that Centre is a golden, Christed orb. Connect into that, sinking deeply in, feeling yourself surrounded by growing things, by nature. Even as you travel up at the speed of light into the high heavens that same cord going up, touching into the Father God itself. Up and up and up for you are held by the Father, nurtured by the Father, led by the Father.
And in this moment, taking a deep breath, receive the loving of the Divine Masculine and come into a divine pause where you listen intently for what the Father God is telling you in this moment. Just hear that message, trust yourself. receive that message, breathe it in and just commit from this moment forward to aligned action.
Stephen said, God meets you at the point of action. So now rise up within the Divine Masculine, letting your courage be amplified for you are on mission for God. And so just commit to allow your doing from this moment forward, to be guided by your being that you are courageous and will jump into battle, but only as directed by that divine listening. That you have courage enough to fight. That you have courage enough not to fight. That you have the wisdom to know the difference. And so you rise up, man and woman, into that Godhead which is where we meet in love. And so be it. Take a deep breath, breathe it all in. Exhale and as you exhale that love amplifies and just say, “I am the courage of love itself. I am the courage of love itself.”
Stephen closing thoughts?
Stephen:
Well I’m going to speak directly to my brothers out there right now. There’s nothing special about me. I am an ordinary man, living my life the best that I know how. So, for each of us listening today, listen to yourself. Get grounded and get clarity about what it is that you want your life to be. I hope that each of us can hear that this isn’t about less than, this is about more of the divinity that you embody and allow, which is the easiest thing in the world. I have found it is so much easier to be me fully, 100% authentic Stephen, than to try to be something, or some version of myself that I thought I should be.
Alisha:
Thank you so much. It’s been an absolute joy and privilege to have you on the show.
Stephen:
It’s so fun and so easy to be with you Alisha and I’m very grateful for what you’re doing in the world. Thank you.
